Rukmini Ananthamurthy
Age : 71
Recently, at the behest of their daughter, we visited an elderly couple residing near Basavangudi in old Bangalore. In our conversation with Rukmini and her husband, Col. Ananthamurthy, we broached the topic directly. We asked Rukmini, “Are you prepared for the possibility that your husband may outlive you?”
This direct inquiry took 71-year-old Rukmini by surprise. Her husband, at 82, is a decade her senior. A car accident a few years ago left him wheelchair-bound due to multiple leg fractures. Recently, arthritis has compounded his challenges. Rukmini reflected on the changes, stating, “Before the accident, he assisted me in the kitchen, fixing meals. Now, I handle the cooking. He used to manage his own laundry and wash the dishes, but post-accident, he no longer drives and frequently relies on a wheelchair.” In contrast, Rukmini, a nine-year cancer survivor, remains active, participating in a laughter club and engaging with women from the area after her morning walks in the newly renovated park. She manages pain through exercise and socialisation, not medication. When not attending to her husband, she stays involved in Rotary club meetings and social events.
Mrs. Rukmini explained, “As my husband’s primary caregiver, recognising the need to plan for scenarios where I might not be present became crucial. With our daughters residing in the US, establishing contingency plans is essential, and that’s precisely why you both are here. I simply asked my daughter to set up a meeting with you.”
During our meeting, we learned that Rukmini’s daughters, residing in US are very much involved in their parents affairs. Both daughters are willing to spend any amount of money for their parents comforts. They have provided support systems and an array of manpower like, full time driver, full time maid servants, full time caregiver, gardener. Though far away, they make use of the modern day technology and amenities for long distance caregiving.
Takeaway
Providing care from a distance brings special challenges for both the caregiver and their loved one. Overcoming these challenges requires setting up suitable support systems. Thanks to today’s technological innovations, staying connected is just a click away. Embrace technology to bridge the distance with your loved one.
